How frequently have you heard the statement "I'll never be able to forgive myself for what I have done?" Maybe you are even guilty of making that statement yourself. Forgiveness could be a terribly hard thing to offer another who has damaged or hurt us, but forgiving ourselves looks to be even harder. There seems to be an inclination to hold ourselves much more accountable than we hold others for the same offense.
Why is that? One reason is pride. While that may seem to be a contradiction, it's truly not. Whenever we impose a different set of rules, or enact a higher set of standards for ourselves over others, that is pride. When we will be able to find it within our self to pardon others, but not ourselves, what we are in effect saying is that we are less capable of making a poor decision than others. We are stating that we suspect our self to be more discerning, reasonable, more insightful and more careful than others, and therefore , we haven't any excuse for doing what we did and shouldn't excuse ourselves. When God Himself, offers to pardon the sins of all who seek His forgiveness but we refuse to excuse ourselves, we are setting ourselves above others and that, called by any other name is still pride.
So how does one pardon one's self? Straightforward, just like they'd pardon some other person. The beliefs are the same.
First, one must find the forgiveness of God for all sin finally is against Him. King David reminded us of that when he sought forgiveness for sleeping with a married woman. He then compounded his wrong when he had her hubby removed from the picture by ordering him to the front lines of battle where he knew he'd be killed. In Psalm 51:3&4, he cries out to God and says, "For I know my transgressions, and my sin is ever before me. Against you and you only I have sinned and done what is evil in your sight."
God is prepared and waiting to pardon your sin and then, He promises to remember it no more.
I John 1:9 "If we confess our sin, He's loyal and just to forgive us our sin and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness."
The following step is to remember that forgiveness is a choice, not a feeling. In the same way you need to choose to forgive somebody, (not just try and feel happier about them or what they did) you need to opt to pardon yourself.
Next, it is vital to recollect that forgiveness does not necessarily mean excusing the action "for another person, or yourself. That's what so dynamic about forgiveness. It's choosing to forgive despite the incorrect or ghastly thing done to or by you. It also suggests not dwelling on it any more or bringing it up again in any farther conversation, either with others, or yourself.
When true forgiveness happens, it involves taking pity on that person and spotting that they want grace as much as you do. Forgiving yourself means taking pity on yourself, as much as you would anybody else. Along with that, goes spotting and acknowledging your need for grace. Don't be tough on yourself. You are a human with weakness and flaws and a great capacity for making mistakes. Accept accountability for the wrongs you've done, receive God's forgiveness and then extend that hand of mercy to your self.
If, God in all His greatness and power freely extends forgiveness to you when you ask, who are you not to discover how to forgive yourself?
Why is that? One reason is pride. While that may seem to be a contradiction, it's truly not. Whenever we impose a different set of rules, or enact a higher set of standards for ourselves over others, that is pride. When we will be able to find it within our self to pardon others, but not ourselves, what we are in effect saying is that we are less capable of making a poor decision than others. We are stating that we suspect our self to be more discerning, reasonable, more insightful and more careful than others, and therefore , we haven't any excuse for doing what we did and shouldn't excuse ourselves. When God Himself, offers to pardon the sins of all who seek His forgiveness but we refuse to excuse ourselves, we are setting ourselves above others and that, called by any other name is still pride.
So how does one pardon one's self? Straightforward, just like they'd pardon some other person. The beliefs are the same.
First, one must find the forgiveness of God for all sin finally is against Him. King David reminded us of that when he sought forgiveness for sleeping with a married woman. He then compounded his wrong when he had her hubby removed from the picture by ordering him to the front lines of battle where he knew he'd be killed. In Psalm 51:3&4, he cries out to God and says, "For I know my transgressions, and my sin is ever before me. Against you and you only I have sinned and done what is evil in your sight."
God is prepared and waiting to pardon your sin and then, He promises to remember it no more.
I John 1:9 "If we confess our sin, He's loyal and just to forgive us our sin and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness."
The following step is to remember that forgiveness is a choice, not a feeling. In the same way you need to choose to forgive somebody, (not just try and feel happier about them or what they did) you need to opt to pardon yourself.
Next, it is vital to recollect that forgiveness does not necessarily mean excusing the action "for another person, or yourself. That's what so dynamic about forgiveness. It's choosing to forgive despite the incorrect or ghastly thing done to or by you. It also suggests not dwelling on it any more or bringing it up again in any farther conversation, either with others, or yourself.
When true forgiveness happens, it involves taking pity on that person and spotting that they want grace as much as you do. Forgiving yourself means taking pity on yourself, as much as you would anybody else. Along with that, goes spotting and acknowledging your need for grace. Don't be tough on yourself. You are a human with weakness and flaws and a great capacity for making mistakes. Accept accountability for the wrongs you've done, receive God's forgiveness and then extend that hand of mercy to your self.
If, God in all His greatness and power freely extends forgiveness to you when you ask, who are you not to discover how to forgive yourself?
About the Author:
Burton Rager author of "Living Life Set Free" and "God's Answer?" Click to learn more about Forgiving Yourself and receive a complimentary copy of "God's Answer?" To warch a video go to How To Forgive Yourself
